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⁣WHAT IS LOVE? from Ariyan Habib's blog

What is love? One of the most frequently asked questions and one that many people have thousands of answers to is. No one can really define it. Many have tried to describe it based on a feeling they experience, but we can tell you this: Love is not a feeling. Love is a decision that we make.


Love, unlike feelings, do not come and go; love stays and commits itself to one person through the good and through the bad. Without commitment, love ceases to exist. A commitment filled love is what differentiates relationships that fall apart when times get a bit rough with the relationships that continue to strive even when life turns them upside down. Many of us have beliefs about love and romance which actually prevents us from making intelligent choices when it comes to love. Love myths, we call it. Let's take a look at the three deadliest ones and set it straight.


Myth #1 - True romantic love conquers all.

As long as you're in love, you can get through anything in life. Having this belief prevents you from dealing with real relationship problems. You will end up beating yourself up emotionally whenever things do turn sour as you depend everything on this 'feeling' of love you have towards your partner.

Truth: Romance is not enough to make a relationship work. What will get you through the tough times are compatibility and commitment that you both share together. A good foundation and strength will make a marriage last. Romance is simply the icing on the cake that is already wonderfully delicious.


Myth #2 - You'll know true love at first sight.

True love doesn't happen in an instant. It is infatuation that hits you at first sight. Be careful. Confusing infatuation for true love can make you ignore the rest of the relationship. Not only that, you may also miss the chance for the real and lasting love.

Truth: True love happens after time has passed, after you have seen the good and the not so good parts about your partner and vice versa. It takes just a moment to experience infatuation or lust, but true love takes time. That is what makes love so much more special and rare, it simply does not happen that quickly.


Myth #3 - The perfect partner will fulfill you completely.

You need to be in a relationship in order to be happy and fulfilled within yourself. You need someone to fill a void within you and that person will be your perfect partner. There are two major dangerous things about this belief, is the fact that there is a 'perfect' partner and the fact that someone else can 'complete' you.

Truth: Your partner may fulfill many of your needs, but certainly not all of them. No one is or should be held responsible for making you feel complete. If you feel emotionally empty before you enter a relationship, you will feel just as empty once you are in it. Be happy with yourself and who you are first and foremost, before you enter any relationships.


Remember, that love is not a feeling you feel but it is a decision you make, which requires time and true commitment. So, now, let's talk about you. Do you really love the person you are with? Does your relationship defy these myths? And do you now know if whether or not you love each other truthfully? There's something to think about today.


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By Ariyan Habib
Added May 9 '2020, 12:55

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